Found this company the other day on Facebook. According to their site, each Rose Bear is made by hand and takes almost an entire day to complete. There’s no denying that if someone got me this for Valentine’s Day, I’d love them forever! ❤️❤️
I have. A new recliner chair. It’s very comfy. but I am worried.
Mochi. Has decided that the best place to sleep is between my feet on the footrest. and when I have my laptop open I tend to. forget that he’s there.
I am going to dump him onto the floor.
Maybe not tonight, maybe not tomorrow night but Eventually He will end up rudely dumped onto the floor, like so much salad.
Pictured: a cat unaware of the fate probably rapidly approaching him, despite me telling him three times now. He is too comfy to care.
Question: You dump your salads on the floor? Why?
Comorbid ADHD and carpal tunnel have lead to a disorder that I like to call “clumsy bitch syndrome” wherin if I get distracted or grab something wrong I will just… Drop whatever I’m holding? For some reason my favorite salad bowl is a regular victim. Also happens to piles of laundry, the TV remote, and sometimes knives.
I have a strict policy of never holding babies.
G U E S S W H A T I D I D
Mochi is either very forgiving or very bad at cause and effect.
Two different socks, t w o d I f f e r e n t s o c k s, T W O D I F F E R E N T S O C K S
They live in my shoes most of the time, so they’re the same by the most useful metric (Thickness).
In other news,
I tried to give mochi a headscritch while he was on the stairs.
my stairs are basically carpet-covered slabs of wood, with no “backing” so you can see through them. They’re also directly above the stairs that go down to the basement, so there’s a bit of a drop.
mochi
rolled over for bellyrubs
and fell
through the stairs
about six feet
before rolling over mid-air and catching himself on the floor/ledge above the basement stairs, claws digging into the wood like mufasa during that one scene that fucked up everyone’s childhood.
Unlike Mufasa
Mochi is both strong and not predestined to die for narrative purposes
so he hauled his fat ginger ass up over the ledge as I got to the bottom of the stairs.
he stared at me.
I stared at him.
Mochi then bellowed his loudest and most victorious of cat bellows, and threw himself into my chair and rolled over for bellyrubs. Which i gave him.
i am afraid
as Mochi is a ginger like my husband his father
that my son may have inherited my Clumsy Bitch Disease
I have always imagined the American magical community in Harry Potter to be significantly less… structured than that of Britain. America is just so big, and the states can be so different, and history is so fucked up and complicated that a whole secret society with a completely separate government and people who’re totally clueless about the muggle world just makes no sense to me.
American wix participate in general elections and watch tv and their kids go to muggle school during the day and learn magic at home or in after-school programs and play quidditch and football and only your great grandma has owls while everyone else just has a phone and generally don’t obliviate muggles who see magic shit bc lol who’s gonna believe them anyway.
And European wix haaaate dealing with them bc they won’t do things the Proper Magical Way they just do whatever the fuck they want bc AMERICA FUCK YEAH.
Agreed. Also It’s cannon that Americans play a different version of qudditch.
And only the really rich, really old families actually go to a private magic school because it’s more expensive than, like, Princeton. Everybody else, yeah, learns at home or congregates on the weekends for idk the magical version of Sunday school?
I didn’t like this at first but it makes a lot of sense?
I actually think the kids learning in a sort of Sunday School type setting would be most realistic–given the USA’s past w/ Christianity and religious affiliations it would be easiest to fly under the radar if your kids went to a “church” on “Sunday” and learned there. And then it’s not just that your kids are learning but parents get to spend time w/ other magical people because very few work with only magic people in their jobs. With big potions potlucks, where people come together with batches of potions and share them around.
And the idea of parents also being super active in teaching their kids magic makes a lot of sense because parents would WANT to pass it on to their kids.
And I would imagine a COMPLETELY different communication system would develop, like with owls become far less popular for long distance communication because you couldn’t really send a letter across the state, let alone the country, by owl so you wind up with other forms of communication–like what if there was a system similar to Floo powder but instead of yourself you could light a candle and throw some floo powder on it with a letter and send it that way?
Also I imagine that magic itself would just be really, really different because the US is such a melting pot. You’d have so many different cultures doing their magic & there would be different types of magic mixed together.
And so rather than an Official Start To Your Education, you start learning from a very small age because you just teach them as you go, like ABCs and numbers.
OH and when you are of age you DO get to go to magic summer camps. Whether you go to sleep away camp or it’s a camp at your “church.” Mostly so you can learn about things your parents can’t teach you, like about different magical animals and large varieties of plants that are hard to grow in a garden.
Then you graduate muggle high school and you get the chance to go to muggle college or maybe a wizard college (like the Salem Witches’ Institute) if your family is influential enough or you are particularly gifted and get a scholarship.
But there are magic clubs at many of the colleges and your “church” sends a list of student names to the clubs so they can be brought into the circles and given community but also learn more magic, with professors heading these clubs and running these like additional classes. So you are taking both muggle and magic classes.
And any magical muggles would be detected likely because teachers in schools would keep their eyes out for them and talk to their parents and get them into magical circles.
SO it’d be a little sloppy but eventually most magical muggles would make it into the magic world before college graduation.
I just imagine a life where muggles don’t know about them, but magical folk sure know about muggles and are completely woven into muggle society.
floo candles - a candle made with floo powder mixed into the wax, making the candle green. the flame burns green, and there’s a spell on it to read the address so you don’t need to holler. the candle at the other end lights momentarily to spit out the letter. to call, you do have to call out the location, but then you can just talk into the candle for as long as you want. to hang up, blow out the candle. to slam the reciever down, slam a cup over the candle to make a clapping noise on the other end before the connection cuts. you can text with a floo candle by passing a bit of parchment back and forth
Casually remind them you can very easily take this to the next level. And they can earn jail time while you lay back in your chair, having saved yourself and everyone else from a violent criminal.
Your online actions have real life consequences.
Make sure they learn that.
(Just in case there’s a “the police wouldn’t do that” - Yes. They absolutely would.
Or a “I can handle it.” No. That person will continue to harass others as well. And one of them may not be as strong as you. So do it for them and everyone else.
Or a “It’s not that severe.” Yes. It is. People have died because of this. It really is that severe.)
Take action. And make sure the lives of these bullies are truly wrecked.
You guys better fucking reblog this.
Don’t just like it, reblog it. So people know.
Hear that anons, you better be nice. I’ve seen some really nasty anons before sent to friends, and that’s not okay. At all.
Good to know all those fucking people on my blog broke the goddamn law.
it’s so hilarious to me that straight women think they are so irresistible to us gay women that we are just waiting to pounce on them as soon as we’re in the same space like nah we can smell your homophobia from miles away you fucking gremlins
reblog to kill the predatory lesbian myth
This but also cis lesbians about trans lesbians
reblog again to kill the predatory trans women myth
This is one of the best pieces of comedy that I have ever had the pleasure of witnessing. I love this. I have been looking for this online for awhile.
[Audio transcription: I wanted to tell you one story. Uh. This is the story of the best meal I’ve ever had in my life, okay. Happened when I was eleven years old in Chicago, IL where I grew up. I went to a place called the Salt & Pepper Diner, uh, with my best friend John. We walk into the diner one day, and they had a jukebox there, okay? And the jukebox was three plays for a dollar. So we put in 7 dollars and selected 21 plays of of Tom Jones’s What’s New Pussycat. And then we ordered and waited.
Here’s the thing about when, uh, What’s New Pussycat plays over and over and over and over and over again. The second time it plays, your immediate thought is not ‘hey someone’s playing What’s New Pussycat again.’ It’s ‘hey, What’s New Pussycat is a lot longer than I first thought. The third time it plays you’re thinking maybe someone’s playing What’s New Pussycat again. The fourth time it plays you’re either thinking ‘whoa someone just played What’s New Pussycat FOUR TIMES or at least someone played it twice, and it’s a really long song.’ So the fifth time is the kicker, alright?
Now, John and I we’re watching the entire diner at this point, alright? Most people have gotten wind as to what’s going on. And we’re staring at this one guy and he’s sitting in like a booth with his stupid kids jumping around, and he’s like staring at his coffee cup like this, and he’s been onto us since the beginning. And he’s sitting there, and his hand is shaking, and he had this look on his face like, aw, like he had just gotten his thirty day chip from anger management. And he’s staring like this, and the fourth song fades out. It’s dead quiet. Then, I don’t know if you know this, but the song begins very quietly…
BWAAAH BWAAAAAH WHAT’S NEW PUSSYCAT and he goes GOD DAMN IT and pounds on the table, silverware flies everywhere, and it was fantastic. But a word about my best friend John and what a genius he was because when we first walked into the diner, okay? When we first got there and I’m punching in the What’s New Pussycats alright? I’ve punched in like 7 at this point then John says to me ‘hey hey hey before you punch in another What’s New Pussycat let’s drop in one It’s Not Unusual.’
Oh yes. That is when the afternoon went from good to great. After sevenWhat’s New Pussycats. In a row - It played seven times. Suddenly - Dum da dum, IT’S NOT UNUSUAL and the sigh of relief that swept through the diner. People were so happy. It was like the liberation of France. You know for years scientists have wondered can you make grown men and women weep tears of joy by playing Tom Jones’s It’s Not Unusual and the answer is yes you can. Provided that it is preceded by seven What’s New Pussycats. It’s true. Dead honest.
And on the other hand. When we went back. Holy shit. It’s Not Unusual fade out. It’s dead quiet. BWAAAH BWAAAAH WHAT’S NEW PUSSYCAT people went insane. People went out of their minds. No one could handle it. No one could handle it. And they were surrounded by this seemingly indifferent staff that was just like ‘yup some crap as always.’
They unplugged the jukebox after eleven plays. And that was the best meal I ever had.]
